(originally posted on www.createdbychance.blogspot.com on 10/12/14)
As a self-diagnosed introvert, talking myself into attending some kind of event/party/meeting/seminar/class/friend date/anything that requires leaving the house results in a pretty intensive, although totally predictable, thought process.
Friends may wonder why I’m generally not very spontaneous. It’s because I have to allow time for this process to talk myself into going to whatever it is I’m invited to. It goes a little something like this:
- Receive invitation. Read it and pretend not to have seen it for at least two hours. (I say read, because all my good friends know that I don’t do phone calls. Text messages and emails are my preferred modes of communication.)
- Two hours later, read it again.
- Look at the date/time this event is to take place, and hope there is already something on the calendar.
- Realize there is nothing on the calendar and that I have no reasonable excuse to not go.
- Think up alternate reasons why I may not be able to go. Don’t I have some kind of deadline looming or something? Doesn’t someone need to be driven somewhere? Is my favorite TV show on at that time?
- Realize I have no good alternate reasons not to go.
- Decide to do nothing about the invitation for the moment, until I can think about it some more.
- Next day, revisit the invitation. Imagine what it might be like to go, if I decided to go.
- Think about who I might see, what I might wear, how long the event could go, how much energy may need to be expended.
- Fight the urge to just not accept the invitation for no reason.
- Ignore invitation again for a little while until I can think about it some more.
- Look at the invitation again, and think about saying yes.
- Do nothing.
- A bit later, practice saying “yes” by telling my husband that I think I might go to this thing.
- Feel disappointed that he can’t come up with a reason for me not to go.
- Do nothing.
- Eventually, come to terms with the fact that I am accepting the invitation.
- Finally, after exhausting all options, accept the invitation with enthusiasm.